When I got pregnant, it made sense to me why everyone always said, "Get married first." Because I couldn't imagine doing it alone. I couldn't imagine raising a son AND providing the best for him without both a father and mother. To me, there is simply no family without this.
As I mentioned in my marriage post, my husband and I mutually decided to start our family by getting married. We set the foundation for our lives. And this includes having a child.
I grew up in a household with both my mom and dad. So did my husband. It was only natural for us to do the same thing, since this is what we knew.
My father-in-law once asked me, "What couples do you know that aren't married say they want to have a child?" And my reply was, "None."
To be frank, it made sense. I knew no one who wasn't married say they wanted children.
I know life happens. I know that things happen between couples that maybe I don't understand simply because I never experienced anything like it.
I also know that there are mothers and fathers out there who do make it work. Who do put their issues aside for the common good of raising their children. Who never got married. Or who didn't stay married.
But for us, our family is the most important thing in our lives.
When we had Michael, it came natural for us to assume specific roles within our family. I never thought I would be a stay-at-home Mom. My husband never knew he would be the primary breadwinner. But these things worked for our family. And we are thriving.
These only made sense because we have a foundation and a plan for our family. Which was made possible by our marriage. I'd like to believe that the hard work we put into our relationship before having Michael (and still to this day) is a testament to how much he means to us. And we hope we too have set an example for him for his future. On how to be a man. On what should truly be valued. On what a responsibility it is to be a spouse and to be a parent.
I don't want to brag. But family is one thing in my life that I'm proud of. Pardon my language, but I work every. damn. day. to make this family life work. It's not easy being a woman. A wife. A mother. I'm not perfect nor is my family. But the fact that I know that I put my 100% effort into this day in, and day out, is why I'm happy. Why I'm proud.
People oftentimes say, "Wow. You're lucky that Michael will grow up with both parents together."
I say, "No, it's not luck. It was a choice."
A choice everyone has. But not everyone chooses.